(no subject)

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary...

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Excerpts from a Cat's Diary.

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. ................for now

(no subject)

I am a horrible cat mommy. I should be flogged. I went into the kitchen a few minutes ago and there were the boys, sitting in a circle intently watching the formerly live mouse....waiting for it to move again.

I praised them highly for the kill, and promptly took the now dead mouse away and disposed of it.

And now they are all looking at me like I am the worst person in the world for taking away their toy.

(no subject)

I'm trying to get sick again. Yesterday I slept late and threw my whole schedule off. I forgot to take my allergy meds. At 8PM last night my cat allergies finally kicked in, but I was out and didn't get a chance to take my pill until almost 10PM. By then I was sneezing, snotty, and itchy.

By the time I went to bed at 2AM, I was still suffering, so I took another allergy pill. Sometime during the night my sinuses began to drain. I woke with a stuffy face, sore throat, and general feeling of Oh shit, here we go again...

I've had all my meds this morning. I've had some dayquil to try and get things moving again. I've been blowing neon green things out of my nose since noon. I need to find some food and take a C and some Zinc.

(no subject)

Ok. Home again after running TMF to work and stopping by Virginia's and reassuring her that her son isn't going to be blown to bits in Afghanistan.

I really should get the tree out of the shop. I should finish picking up the craft stuff. I should do some dishes.

I am going to empty the catbox in the living room because, frankly, Phew!

And I am going to lay down because I feel like shit.

(no subject)

I did not get a nap this afternoon. I also didn't get the cat box cleaned out. Right after I hit post, Kelly showed up for a visit. So I sat on the floor, beaded a new choker, and sniffed a lot.

I did make hamburger soup though after he left.

I think I'm going to bed early tonight. My sinuses feel like hammered crap.