Ew.

So. I woke up a bit ago, went to the bathroom, contemplated the meaning of life, death, and everything. And noticed my ear was itching. One of my earring holes to be exact. Itching like mad. So I looked in the mirror, thinking I had an infected hole perhaps. I wear a stainless steel hoop in my second holes, and have never had an issue before, but there's a first time for everything.

I didn't see any redness or swelling, but it was itching like a group of Mexican fire ants were dancing in there. I moved the hoop a few times, trying to get some relief. No deal. So I decided to give it a squeeze.

Squeezing one's earlobe is an interesting bit of contortionism. Especially when said earlobe has a ring in it. But I managed.

And I also managed to squeeze out this thing......this black thing of unmentionable evil.

It was about 1/4 inch long. It was curved on one side, channeled on the other....it had followed the shape of my ear and the hoop. It was black. For a moment, I was afraid it was alive.

Demon came into the bathroom complaining about an air pump for a mattress and saw it and in a disgusted shocked voice asked me what the hell it was and where it had come from.

We both then looked at the ear, in horror, wondering what the hell else could be in there.

Anticlimatic as it may be, that's it. Nothing else was in there. The ear still itches some, but nowhere near the level of the previous itch. It is still neither red, nor swollen. The offending....whatever....is now residing in the toilet.

The weird shit the human body can produce.